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[16 Jun 2006|11:02pm] |
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we got a new computer, it's insanley fast, i don't even know how to explain. tomorrow im gone. which will be nice, i like long car rides and trips where you do nothing but read and write. oh and study the "how to drive a car" book. it's hilarious, nathaniel and i were looking through it and we've never been so entertained. im not really sad that school is over, i don't think i really care. the people i want to see over the summer i will, but other than that im done with it. later days 10th grade.
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[07 Jun 2006|07:09am] |
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last night was seriously the worst nightmare i've had for a very long time, it was so real. i woke up crying, i guess because i was crying in the dream. also there was a lot of pain, are you supposed to feel actual pain in your dreams? because i do. i won't actually write it down right now seeing as how i have to go to school. maybe later, im still a little disturbed.
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[02 Jun 2006|11:14pm] |
im pretty sure i have someone to take to faux prom....W00T.
so party tonight at ian's...was ok. silas, lucas, karl, and jake walked around without shirts. silas and lucas made chesse sticks which were gross. i didnt feel well. zander and laurel were making out and then lucas ran to them with a pick pack of bacon saying, "WE IS GONNA MAKE SOME BACON BITCHES."
endterm is hilarious. kate pretended to be her cat...and started talking...like her cat? eli and i tickle and launch rubber bands at each other.
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| updating from eli's house: |
[22 Apr 2006|09:29pm] |
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eli chandler and i have major parties. we are the party faces. aka we lay on the floor with blankets of all of us and snuggle. we are the strange party. victor looks around the small computer as we dance and sing. eli and ione get into fights over which movie we're going to watch. they both throw the two DVDs under the radiator and see who will give in first. eli and chandler are inapproiate, but i eat cake and ice cream and everything is fine. eli wears man diapers. we're watching king kong later lovies.
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[27 Feb 2006|08:12pm] |
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books, gimme books, lots and lots of books.
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| burn it, burn it |
[24 Jan 2006|06:10pm] |
charles giving me a ride home today was far more hilarious than randy giving me a ride home. well, to some extent, randy giving me a ride home was surprisingly unawkward/almost killed me. lets compare:
Randy: you know...right?
me: ...know...?
randy: yeah, do you, KNOW.
me: hm, know..like, know know?
randy: yeah, do you KNOW.
me: that KNOW? yeah, i know that KNOW.
randy: ok, so you KNOW?
me: i know more about that KNOW than you do.
randy:...yeah.
ok charles:
charles: do you want to listen to some music?
ione and me: sure
charles: it's weird, really weird. only weird people listen to it...ha, like me.
and i didnt erase any ones comment, i was deleting the one of them since i made two, but i guess the one i deleted had the comments on it..so...oops.
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| the last snake hissed as he was thrown in the fire |
[08 Dec 2005|07:17pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 dorky |
] |
| [ |
music |
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let your troubles roll by - carbon leaf |
] |
YONK. i actually can't read. Rachel has been hanging out with me a lot...i find this to be REALLY weird. err i read a personal piece in writing, it went well until i almost started crying and rachel was holding my hand/arm. WHAT the fuck is happening to me. this year needs to end, now. it needs to be over. my new years resolution is to kill ian and or erik. someone NEEDS to die. during humanities i made a crossword puzzle on the board and it was awesome.
#5)what is my brother's name?
sam newman:vincent!
rachel:omar!
josh:damien? god, this is dumb.
zack:marcella!
tory:I SAID BROTHER
oh hilarity. greg called me lucifer today so then i gave everyone nicknames:
tory = lucifer
greg = squeetis
archie = thor
chandler = tea overload
phoebe = $77 in coins
natasha = trips over plants
alison = lino block
Fin.
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| sigh |
[19 Oct 2005|09:22pm] |
Stolen from Alison, but I found it gave me a chuckle.
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[16 Oct 2005|05:32pm] |
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COLD
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[29 Sep 2005|09:01pm] |
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art homework makes me want to jump off a cliff.
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| whooo |
[26 Jul 2005|10:07pm] |
I swear i'll never post lyrics again, but you see, I have to.
You say hello, inside I'm screaming I love you
You say goodnight, in my mind
I'm sleeping next to you
You drive away from my car crash of a heart
And I don't know
But you gave me the best mixtape I have
And even all the bad songs ain't so bad
I just wish there was so much more than that
About me and you
You talk to him, and it burns me like the sun
You talk to her, you say that you feel like he's the one
I talk to me, but you can't hear the pain I feel
You don't know
Cause you gave me the best mixtape I have
Even all the bad songs ain't so bad
I only wish there was more than that
About me and you
Bridge
Oh, don't turn around and say bye again
Yeah it crushes my head when you call me
Your friend and I'm not the same person
From back in the day in the back of the class
That you thought was gay
No I can't find the words cause I lost them
The minute they fell out of my mouth
And it's love and I'm in it, so give me your lips
And just let me kiss 'em
And let's get messed up and listen to probably...
The best mixtape I have
And even all the bad songs ain't so bad
I just wish there was so much more than that
About me and you
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| a female battalion of ginger bread women |
[06 Apr 2005|08:58pm] |
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hmmm, two months and no update...this does not seem odd to me. So let me explain what i've done...ready for my long list? Because it's not coming. I haven't done anything. My french kid is here...that would be nice except that it means spending more time with my grade...not so nice. As alison would put it, i am shunned by them. So yes, i went to a party with them, did i sit in a corner...maybe...no...OK FINE I DID. Well you would too if they were playing terrible music... Umm alison came over, that was fun. I got new shoes...i want skull laces...awesome. Um k bye
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| creative |
[18 Feb 2005|10:45am] |
Sweatshirt sleeves rolled to your elbows,
Converse dragging on the pavement,
Khaki pants getting muddy.
Turn around and look,
Everyone walking in groups,
But you don’t want to.
Everyone talking,
And you’re getting a headache.
Away from you, away from them,
The schools in view,
Go through the back door.
Up the stairs,
Walk past your class.
Don’t look back,
You’re almost there.
Through the window,
Out in the air.
It’s cold out,
But you don’t care.
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| no checks, no cash, no problem |
[18 Feb 2005|10:40am] |
havent really done anything lately, and i have a four day weekend so im home doing nothing. i'll update when i get back from vermont, maybe then something will have happend.
Little angel go away,
come again some other day.
The devil has my ear today.
I'll never hear a word you say.
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| my broken valentine (not in that sense) |
[14 Feb 2005|09:27pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 just here |
] |
Water Ran Cold
I use to think I loved you
I use to think I cared
Then one day you left my life
And I didn’t shed a tear.
I use to think I loved you
I use to think I cared
Then one day you left my life
I think I’ll leave you there.
I use to think I loved you
I use to think I cared,
But one fine day you left my life
And now I really don’t care.
You broke and bruised me,
Burned and fooled me.
Shattered my trusting heart,
Making it only a half.
You made the mistake of hurting someone close,
Someone who really did care.
In hurting them you hurt me more,
Because I trusted you not to do that.
You left your handy work everywhere.
I picked up the broken pieces,
But mine are all still scattered,
And will never be found.
It is because of you I have half my heart,
And that half is nothing but cold ice and hatred.
My warm and loving side was taken by you
And squeezed until my blood ran dry.
No one can find it and no one will refill it.
That’s because it’s with you, and always will.
Because you were once in that half heart, being my family
Being my friend.
But one fine day I kicked you out,
And I didn’t let you back in.
-tory l.
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| that was then...this is now |
[08 Feb 2005|09:39pm] |
you use to believe in me
you use to see me
you use to feel me
you use to comfort me
then one day it all ended
i suffered infront of you
but you looked the other way
i pleaded for your words of assurance
but you tormented me in mute response
i reached for your hands to pull me up
but you pushed me down
i wanted you to see me for me
but you wanted something else
i walked away
this is the end
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| forever yours |
[07 Feb 2005|05:52pm] |
"Pieces"
I tried to be perfect
But nothing was worth it
I don’t believe it makes me real
I thought it’d be easy
But no one believes me
I meant all the things I said
If you believe it’s in my soul
I’d say all the words that I know
Just to see if it would show
That I’m trying to let you know
That I’m better off on my own
This place is so empty
My thoughts are so tempting
I don’t know how it got so bad
Sometimes it’s so crazy
That nothing can save me
But it’s the only thing that I have
If you believe it’s in my soul
I’d say all the words that I know
Just to see if it would show
That I’m trying to let you know
That I’m better off on my own
On my own
I tried to be perfect
It just wasn’t worth it
Nothing could ever be so wrong
It’s hard to believe me
It never gets easy
I guess I knew that all along
If you believe it’s in my soul
I’d say all the words that I know
Just to see if it would show
That I’m trying to let you know
That I’m better off on my own
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| i smile, but i don't mean it |
[06 Feb 2005|08:01am] |
| [ |
music |
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if theres typos i dont care |
] |
it's the same but different when ever i come to your door. the decorations change with the season, and it differces to who answers when i knock on your portal. your, or our mom, depending on the way you look at it, greets me with that usual smile and a, "tory how are you dear?" i'm not called dear by anyone but alisha's mom, since i usually don't like it, but hearing it from her made me smile and think, this is awesome, im known as her adopted kid, IM PART OF THE FMILY WHERE'S MY BED. i say im ducky and i ask about her in return, she says fine and i enter. not to my surprise, alisha is standing in her door way in shorts and a pats shirt 10 sizes to big for her, and waving with that big stupid smile she gets when she's up to something. i don't look at anything besides my destination, my spot on the floor between the computer and the rabbit. this time my attention was drawn to the nook that had been so neatly made. how could i refuse it? it was the perfect size to fint into and curl up in. not that i was going to do that. i sat there listening to you talk to your cat and the game on tv, though i wasnt really listening to it. i only heard your clock. the one that you keep on your desk and it ticks every second. it didnt really bother me anymore, i had grown used to it. remembering i had practially lived in your house up until the time i went to france. now i didnt stop in so much, but when i did it was always that clock i heard entering your room. besides your little giggle that you get when somethings happend. your room is more decorated then mine. countless pohtographs of people, and varies articles of things around. from care bears to your hand chair. the one thing that caught my eye everytime i was here was the picture of us. my eating cream and looking in the total oppostie direction of the camera, and you doing your celebrity pose. oh how odd we were...i always leave your house looking at the ground, no need to look up, i know almost every piece of your kitchen, even if i dont know where your food is, though im sure i'd eat it all if i knew. leaving your house was always hard, not because i didnt want to, which was not the case, but because i still couldnt open your door so well. i heard the cat collar jingle before you closed the door, and then the insides your your home faded, and so did my memory.
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